Behind Dark Eyes

With special guest:

• Jeff Apter
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Everyone remembers Jon English with those raccoon eyes and tall thin frame contributing to a very distinctive appearance.

Jon English had regular appearances in so many different forms of entertainment. He was a rock singer, a star of live musicals, a romantic star of acclaimed television series, and at all times a rascal. In between those activities he wrote sensitive music and became an entrepreneur.

But there was a lot more to his fascinating story as revealed by our guest today. Jeff Apter wrote Behind Dark Eyes: The True Story of Jon English. It is the subtitle of the book which gives a clue that all was not sunshine and roses for Jon English.

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The Therapist

With special guest:

• Dr Hugh Mackay AO
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

This is a rare chance to peek inside a Psychotherapist’s office.

Hugh Mackay has a wealth of experience to draw on after so many years working in the community as a social psychologist surveying what we think of ourselves and our issues. After listening intently to so many people’s stories he has distilled for us some fascinating characters facing some modern day challenges. There are therapists who have major personal issues, there are some moral issues to resolve and all this is before we get to the clients and the assistance they need.

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SHTUM

With special guest:

• Jem Lester
  …in conversation with Bill Kable
  

In this program we cross to London to discuss with author Jem Lester his novel SHTUM. For anyone who has missed the British television shows and is not sure what “shtum” means Jem tells us that it means “silent or uncommunicative”. That is what a loving father may face when he has a child with profound autism.

The book SHTUM won the 2013 PFD/City University Prize for Fiction but in writing the book Jem tells us he draws on his own experiences having raised a boy now nearly 16 who is profoundly autistic.

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The Equal Parent Presumption

With special guest:

• Dr Edward Kruk
  …in conversation with Bill Kable
  

Our guest today has produced a book of 167 pages, The Equal Parent Presumption: Social Justice in the Legal Determination of Parenting after Divorce, that should be required reading for everyone who works in the space of parenting after divorce; and that includes judges who routinely make sole parenting orders, psychologists who offer family therapy, and all the other institutions that influence family relationships.

The trouble really arises because although there is a mantra of acting “in the best interest of the child” this becomes a discretionary assessment by a judge who has no training in the area of child development or family dynamics and furthermore the Judge takes no interest in reviewing the outcome of the decision. Dr Kruk invites us to take the child’s position.

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Protecting Emilie

With special guest:

• Lisa Heim
  … in conversation with Bill Kable and Ken Thompson

A check in the index of topics will reveal that we have explored parental alienation from different angles by talking to academics, psychologists and researchers. Today we cross to Florida in the USA to hear a very real account of what this type of psychological child abuse looks like to those who are personally caught up in it.

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Flesh Wounds

With special guest:

• Richard Glover
  …in conversation with Bill Kable and Ken Thompson
  

Our guest today is famous.

Richard Glover is the host of the top rating Drive show on 702 ABC Sydney, and the weekly podcast of Thank God It’s Friday. He is the author of twelve books including the bestseller In Bed with Jocasta. His new book Flesh Wounds is in a similar humorous vein but the big difference this time is that it is the real story of his unusual, to say the least, upbringing.

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Dad: the Documentary

With special guest:

• Karen Hodgkins Varney
  …in conversation with Bill Kable and Ken Thompson
  

‘Dad’ is a documentary that Karen Hodgkins made for a higher purpose than looking for film industry awards. This film is a powerful and emotional appeal to the law makers and the law enforcers to do something for the Dads who are not travelling as well as frequently portrayed in our society.

In our interview today Karen tells us that she was asked by a Dad in May 2013 to do some research on the injustices in the Family Court and Child Support systems. This Dad was desperate to spend more time with his own children and suspected there was more going on than the general population is aware of.

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Fathers and Daughters – What are the issues?

With special guest:

• Dr Linda Nielsen
  …in conversation with Bill Kable
  

Our guest, Dr Linda Nielsen speaks to us today from North Carolina in the United States about a topic that nearly everyone has a stake in but on which there is very little guidance. How important is the relationship between a daughter and her father? This topic has been explored by Dr Nielsen in her book Father-Daughter Relationships: Contemporary Research & Issues.

Many studies have been directed at the importance of a mother’s relationships with her children. But a father may need some reassurance about the value of his relationship with his daughter particularly if he feels more comfortable with his son. The first thing we get to check with Dr Nielsen is what is it that fathers do for their daughters? Are they really needed?

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Splitting

With special guest:

• Bill Eddy
  … in conversation with Bill Kable and Ken Thompson

The word Splitting brings to mind a number of possibilities but in Bill Eddy’s book it is not the obvious meaning of breaking up with a partner. Here we are looking at “splitting” meaning a defence mechanism universally seen in people with Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorders. It means unconsciously seeing people as all good or all bad and is especially prevalent when there is stress such as in a break-up with someone the person afflicted sees as critical to emotional survival.

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Out on a Limb

With special guest:

• Simon Turner
  … in conversation with Bill Kable
  

Simon Turner’s book Out on a Limb is refreshingly plain speaking. To read the book is like sitting down with a mate who has some important, perhaps life-changing, information to share. Using language we can all relate to, Simon takes us through the jungle that confronts a father at the gates of a Family Law dispute with the mother of their children.

Simon discusses what he describes as the three golden rules that were passed on to him informally by a Family Court Judge in an Art Gallery rather than a court room. Based on these golden rules Simon gives some invaluable ideas about how a dad can give himself the best chance of continuing to parent his child after a separation or divorce.

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Daddy’s OK

With special guest:

• Dean Mason
  …in conversation with Bill Kable
  

In his book Daddy’s OK: Fathers’ stories of separation, divorce and rebuilding author Dean Mason takes us into the world of 14 families that have been through the trauma of separation and divorce. The 2006 Census showed that 50% of children in single parent families never have an overnight stay with the other parent, normally the Dad. But if our eyes glass over when contemplating the tens of thousands of Dads in this situation Dean brings it back to the individual personal level with these real life stories from his days as National Chairman of Parents Beyond Breakup (formerly Dads in Distress Support Services).

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The Other Glass Ceiling

With special guest

• Charles Areni
  …in conversation with Bill Kable
  

In the news lately there have been frequent references to pay differentials between males and females. This is often put down to the different opportunities available in the workplace because of gender roles that are a hangover from a less-enlightened past. But what about the denial of opportunities to look after the children and get involved in other areas around the home? In brief, Mums have too many roles, Dads have too few.

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Behind Dark Eyes

With special guest:

• Jeff Apter
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Everyone remembers Jon English with those raccoon eyes and tall thin frame contributing to a very distinctive appearance.

Jon English had regular appearances in so many different forms of entertainment. He was a rock singer, a star of live musicals, a romantic star of acclaimed television series, and at all times a rascal. In between those activities he wrote sensitive music and became an entrepreneur.

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The High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide

With special guest:

• Megan Hunter
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Megan Hunter is the co-author with Andrea Larochelle of a new book The High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide with the sub-title Reclaim Your Life One Week at a Time.

Perhaps this book would not be necessary if everyone followed the recommendations contained in Megan’s earlier book Dating Radar: Why Your Brain Says Yes to “The One” Who Will Make Your Life Hell. However as Megan writes in Week 1 you cannot unconsciously or consciously rewrite history in an attempt to save yourself (and your kids) from the present circumstance. It is what it is.

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Daddy Cool

With special guest:

• Darleen Bungey
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

A real feature of the show today is when we go back to 1957 to hear the golden voice of Lawrie Brooks.

Lawrie was born in the United States where he had been named Robert Cutter. But Robert became the most popular singer in Australia under another name, Lawrie Brooks. How he came to wear the new name is a story in itself and just part of the fascinating history told in Darleen Bungey’s book about her father called Daddy Cool: Finding my father, the singer who swapped Hollywood fame for home in Australia.

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Australia Reimagined

With special guest:

• Hugh Mackay AO
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Australia has had a well-documented and unprecedented run of economic growth but this has not translated into a happy, harmonious society. Our guest today is Hugh Mackay who describes the current level of anxiety in Australia as an epidemic.

The level of income inequality in Australia is growing, public education is under-resourced and our children are falling behind when compared to other first world countries.

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The High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide

With special guest:

• Megan Hunter
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Megan Hunter is the co-author with Andrea Larochelle of a new book The High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide with the sub-title Reclaim Your Life One Week at a Time.

Perhaps this book would not be necessary if everyone followed the recommendations contained in Megan’s earlier book Dating Radar: Why Your Brain Says Yes to “The One” Who Will Make Your Life Hell. However as Megan writes in Week 1 you cannot unconsciously or consciously rewrite history in an attempt to save yourself (and your kids) from the present circumstance. It is what it is.

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Australia Reimagined

With special guest:

• Hugh Mackay AO
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Australia has had a well-documented and unprecedented run of economic growth but this has not translated into a happy, harmonious society. Our guest today is Hugh Mackay who describes the current level of anxiety in Australia as an epidemic.

The level of income inequality in Australia is growing, public education is under-resourced and our children are falling behind when compared to other first world countries.

And at a time when we need them most we are losing faith in our major institutions namely the Church, our elected parliamentarians who are supposed to be acting in the country’s interest, the major banks and even the families who give us security. Right now all of these are under threat. Over half of marriages end in divorce in the first ten years leaving children in the lurch. The two Royal Commissions that have investigated banking and before that institutional abuse of children have revealed some of the worst abuses of power.

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The Equal Parent Presumption

With special guest:

• Dr Edward Kruk
   … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest today has produced a book of 167 pages, The Equal Parent Presumption: Social Justice in the Legal Determination of Parenting after Divorce, that should be required reading for everyone who works in the space of parenting after divorce; and that includes Judges who routinely make sole parenting orders, Psychologists who offer family therapy, and all the other institutions that influence family relationships.

The trouble really arises because although there is a mantra of acting “in the best interest of the child” this becomes a discretionary assessment by a Judge who has no training in the area of child development or family dynamics and furthermore the Judge takes no interest in reviewing the outcome of the decision. Dr Kruk invites us to take the child’s position.

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Leading Women for Shared Parenting

With special guest:

• Molly Olson

Why would leading women want to join a group that is striving to achieve the sharing of time that children spend with both parents after separation or divorce? If the approach of the Courts and the legislature has always been that the mothers are essential, fathers not so, why would these women work tirelessly to make changes?

Molly Olson is one of the fair-minded women found around the world who can see the benefits to the children as well as to the parents if the allocated time is shared. After listening to Molly it becomes a no-brainer that in her words the system has to change and it will change.

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