Mothering Our Boys

With special guest:

• Maggie Dent
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

It is ten years since we last spoke to Maggie Dent and in that time the pressure on our boys has only got worse.

Now more than ever we need a consistent voice, a sensible voice backed by extensive research, in fact a boy champion. Fortunately this is recognised in the huge reaction given to Maggie’s new book Mothering Our Boys: A guide for mums of sons and in public forums that Maggie delivers around the nation. It is a privilege for us to be able to share Maggie’s thoughts in this special program.

Here is a question Maggie asked some 1600 men in a survey. What would you say is one of the best things your mum has done for you/that has influenced you? There was a second question, in your life what is the one thing you wish your mum hadn’t done? Why not ask yourself those questions, it may be the first time you have thought about it. Maggie takes us into the responses she received and tells us what it means.

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Dads Group Inc

With special guest:

• Tom Docking
  … in conversation with Glen Poole

Most Dads can remember vividly the time they were told that they were going to be a father for the first time. There may be a sense of starting on a journey, that life as it has been up until that point has changed forever or even that this is a type of eternity because part of you goes on long after your passing.

Our guest today, Tom Docking from Dad’s Group Inc, was overwhelmed by a different feeling. He felt he could not cope with this new responsibility and had to spend some time alone. When he realised that he needed some support there was an unpleasant discovery, no help was available.

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From Bullied to Brilliant

With special guest: 

• Karen Clarke

Have you been bullied? Has anyone in your family been bullied?

In her book From Bullied to Brilliant: How to artfully avoid fitting in, our guest sets out how to understand and deal with bullies. In the program today we get to hear directly from Karen Clarke how to bounce back and turn pain into gain when confronted by bullies.

We learn that bullying can be experienced by anyone at any stage in life and it is nothing to be ashamed of if you are the victim. It is one of the myths of bullying that the victim has shown some weakness that the bully seizes on but in fact bullies are often attracted to people who possess the very qualities they secretly or unknowingly admire.

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Dads and their Babies

With special guest:

• Dr Dawson Cooke
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

We will all readily make the assumption that the bond between mothers and their babies is important for the health of the family but what about the dad-baby bond? Our guest today is Dr Dawson Cooke who is able to discuss that relationship based on the findings in his study recently published in Infant Mental Health. Dr Cooke has been working with parents and particularly fathers for the last 15 years both in his practice and as a researcher at Curtin University in WA. In his latest study which involved 451 families he has made some findings that have caught the attention of the media.

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Ballet Brothers

With special guest:

• Jake Burden
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Jake Burden tells us that everyone can dance. For those with a particular ability and the drive to do all the hard training that goes with being a dancer on the stage Jake tells us there are all sorts of rewards.

On the flip side of these benefits there remains an element in our society that thinks dancing is somehow unmanly, that only young girls should express themselves in this way and because male dancers are seen as different they can be subjected to bullying. This is where Jake Burden steps in to provide a safe haven as the creator of Ballet Brothers, based in Newcastle New South Wales.

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Woo’s Wonderful World of Maths

With special guest:

• Eddie Woo
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

We hardly need to do an introduction for our guest today. Eddie Woo has become very well-known through regular television appearances and YouTube lessons as one of the leading teachers in the world. The Government has recognised this by recently appointing him as a “super teacher” so that he can visit schools around NSW and inspire the teachers to inspire their students.

Ever thought that you were just no good at Maths and anyway what good is Maths in everyday life. Our guest today begs to differ on both counts.

Eddie says Maths is for everyone and he has lots of ways of convincing you that not only is Maths fascinating but it underlies everything in the universe. Yes Eddie Woo comes to Dads on the Air and adds to the audience on his YouTube channel Wootube where he has been viewed a staggering 24 million times (as at November 2018).

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The Children’s House

With special guest:

• Alice Nelson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Alice Nelson has produced a topical work with enough discussion points to keep us busy for a long time in her new book The Children’s House.

The title of the book comes from a kibbutz in Israel. The kibbutz movement arose in Israel after the horrors of Nazi Germany, partly as a way of allowing parents to work for the new state of Israel while ensuring that their children would be properly cared for. But does the idea of communal parenting go too far? This is just one of the ethical questions raised in The Children’s House.

From Israel we travel to Rwanda and finally to the world’s melting pot in New York. It is there that we discover the different forces prevalent in modern families with all their mysteries and complexities. In speaking to Alice about her characters we get even more depth into the non-traditional relationships revealed in her book. There are some real surprises in store for the reader.

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Fathers and Daughters

 

With special guest:

• Madonna King
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

The word “daughter” with its silent letters points to something going on beneath the surface. To find out exactly what is going on between daughters and their Dads calls for a type of explorer who is prepared to investigate widely and give a voice to their thoughts and feelings.

Our guest today is Madonna King one of Australia’s most accomplished journalists. In her new book, Fathers and Daughters: Helping girls and their dads build unbreakable bonds Madonna with her typical thoroughness has interviewed no fewer than 1300 girls and 400 Dads along with a host of school principals, psychologists, researchers and even neuroscientists to give us some answers.

Sometimes the natural instinct of Dads to “fix things” is not what is required. Being a good listener is what his daughter is looking for. Sometimes a practical approach rather than an emotional response is the way to go. Sometimes Dad does not need to do anything, his daughter can learn a lot by modelling and by watching how he relates to others. Dad may show his care by actions rather than words but if that is the case Dad needs to remember just how important he is in his daughter’s life.

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Raising Boys in the Twenty-first Century

With special guest:

• Steve Biddulph AM
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

It was hard enough to raise boys in the 20^th Century. What are the new challenges facing parents who want to raise their sons to be the open-hearted, kind and strong men they can be?

Our guest today has revised and updated his classic parenting book released in 1997, a book that is found in over three million homes around the world. There is a lot of new information and surprising research for Steve to draw on in his new book Raising Boys in the Twenty-first Century. There is a new understanding of hormonal changes as boys turn into men, changes that mean the age from 6 to 14 is when fathers count the most.

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Fatherhood: Stories about being a Dad

With special guest:

• William McInnes …
  in conversation with Bill Kable 

In today’s program we go behind the public face of William McInnes. We do not speak to Max Connors from SeaChange, we speak to William McInnes the Dad from Queensland about his real life love of being a father to his son and daughter.

We get to hear lots of stories as included in William’s new book Fatherhood: Stories about being A Dad. As William tells us, being a Dad is a serious business but it is at the same time a funny, heart-warming and at times scary experience.

This is a Father’s Day special that will bring back many memories for all sorts of Dads and for the children and grandchildren of Dads. There are tales here that sound just like a friendly chat over the back fence, or at a backyard BBQ.

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Surviving Adolescents

With special guest:

• Elly Robinson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

All parents realise on leaving the maternity ward that there is no manual that comes from the hospital with instructions for a new baby. The parents just strap themselves in for the rapid growth and development of this new and totally dependent child.

Ten years later with the coming of adolescence there is another period of risky growth and development. The age group from 10 to 19 calls upon a whole new skill set to deal with challenges some of which are familiar and some that are new to this century.

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Mr Ordinary Goes to Jail

With special guest:

• Wil Patterson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Mr Ordinary Goes to Jail is really a story about choices.

Some choices we hope we will never have to make. Once made they have significant consequences. Wil Paterson found himself facing temptation at a time when he had financial pressures at home and he made a fateful choice.

Wil was at work on an ordinary day. Part of his job was that he was expected to cancel his employer’s cheques when the payee had not been located.

But on this day a returned cheque for $5000 made out in his own name came across his desk and instead of cancelling it Wil decided after a few days to deposit in his own bank account. If it happened that once it could happen again and again until in the end $300,000 had been taken. When Wil was caught, the feeling strangely enough was relief even though he knew it would be the end of his life as he had known it.

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The Boy from Baradine

With special guest:

• Dr Craig Emerson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

This is a rare opportunity. We do not often hear a successful politician being hailed for giving a shockingly personal honest and compelling reflection with brilliant insights. Our guest today is Craig Emerson who opens up about his rollercoaster ride from Baradine a small town in north western NSW to the corridors of power in Canberra.

In his book The Boy from Baradine we follow Craig on his journey. We hear how we are all shaped by our upbringing but this does not mean that we are imprisoned by it. Craig and his brother Lance were subjected to random acts of physical and mental cruelty from their mother and a father who was unable to help while he battled his own demons.

Yet from this unpromising start in life Craig was able to benefit from a good education. By a combination of hard work and some good fortune along the way Craig found himself advising the Prime Minister and bravely standing up for what he thought was right even when under pressure.

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The Boy Crisis

With special guest:

• Dr Warren Farrell
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

The big issues of today include ISIS on the international stage, gangs of youths in our cities and disengaged sons in our families. Our guest today has found a common link in each of these and that is the preponderance of dad deprivation for both the boys and girls involved.

Dr Farrell has been researching for 11 years in order to produce his latest book and some of his findings are eye opening. For example we discover that the downward spiral of boys in the developed world is leading to physical changes. Young men of today have a sperm count of only 50% what their grandfathers had at the same age and it is dropping by 1.5% every year.

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Five Years From Now

With special guest:

• Paige Toon
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In today’s episode we speak to author and citizen of the world Paige Toon who has written a novel exploring the relationship between two children from opposite ends of the world and their fathers.

We drop in on these lives every five years to see how things have changed and we find there are plenty of surprises as we trace the emotional development of the main characters.

The fathers in the story start from different points. One is close to his daughter and always has been. The other did not get to meet his son until he was seven. Yet both children see the importance of that father/child relationship as they make their way through life. The book is all about relationships and how timing can be all important.

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SMS4dads

With special guest: 

• Dr Chris May

Who ya gonna call? 

Our guest today is Dr Chris May from the University of Newcastle and he has a simple message for new Dads with mobile phones. Sign up for SMS4 dads and you will get the advice you need to deal with the new challenges we face as a Dad. This is not limited to young Dads. The age range of Dads already accessing the service extends to the over 50 year olds. 

A really good aspect of this service is that it is available to Dads in remote locations that find it particularly hard to access help. The NBN is opening up the most remote areas to better communication and this will make access easy. 

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Albanese – Telling it Straight

With special guest: 

• Karen Middleton
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Everybody loves Albo - even many of his opponents in the national Parliament.

We can identify the three drives he lists as having influenced his development, namely the Catholic Church, South Sydney Rugby League team and the Australian Labor Party. These drives were all inherited from his fiercely loyal and protective mother Maryanne but behind the relationship between Albo and his mother is another fascinating story that has never been revealed until the release of Karen Middleton’s book Albanese - Telling it Straight.

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An Attachment-Based Model of Parental Alienation

With special guest:

• Dr Craig Childress
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Why is parental alienation such a controversial topic?

Nearly everyone knows someone who has had a child turned against them after separation of the parents. It happens unfortunately all over the world and looks remarkably similar wherever you find it. The construct was defined and given a label, “parental alienation” some thirty years ago by Dr Richard Gardner. More recently there has been a strong push to have it included as a separate diagnosis in the therapists’ “Bible” the DSM-5.

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Men of Honour

With special guest:

• Glen Gerreyn
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest today is Glen Gerreyn a man by choice as distinct from being born male. This personal development did not happen when he became a champion athlete but rather by some important choices that Glen has made in his life. So what does it mean to be a man, a real man? And what are these choices?

Glen has spoken to groups around Australia and around the world on the topic of men of honour and some of the content probably comes under the heading of “secret men’s business”. In these talks no subject is taboo. Because so many fatherless boys in our community do not have a mentor they can confide in, Glen often finds that no-one else has ever spoken to our young men so frankly in language they understand.

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Help! My Son Hates School

With special guest:

• Janet Allison
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

After listening to this show many men will be wishing that they could have had Janet Allison as their teacher in years gone by. Janet speaks to us from Portland Oregon in the USA where she has founded the organisation Boys Alive! to benefit teachers and children in the education process. Janet’s warm style is engaging and inspiring.

It may even sound a little funny to hear a boy say “I hate school” but behind that assertion are some worrying realities in the USA as mirrored in Australia. These include that boys far outweigh girls in every negative statistic as for example more boys than girls are expelled from preschool! More boys than girls have behaviour issues in elementary school; more boys drop out of high school than girls and on it goes.

Janet describes this statement from boys as a Red Flag and says that the current situation has reached crisis proportions. While Janet is herself the mother of two girls she sees this as a problem for everyone in the community. And Janet is well placed as an experienced educator and Family Coach to suggest activities that all parents and teachers can adopt.

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