Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with a Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder

With special guest:

• Bill Eddy

The word Splitting brings to mind a number of possibilities but in Bill Eddy’s book it is not the obvious meaning of breaking up with a partner. Here we are looking at “splitting” meaning a defence mechanism universally seen in people with Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorders. It means unconsciously seeing people as all good or all bad and is especially prevalent when there is stress such as in a break-up with someone the person afflicted sees as critical to emotional survival.

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Parenting today in Amsterdam

With special guest:

• Benjamin Wondergem

Our guest today brings a European flavour to the program. Benjamin has confronted both personally and professionally many of the problems we see in Australia relating to shared parenting and fathers gaining access to their own children if the other parent is unwilling.

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Continued Parenting

With special guest:

• Prof Robert Kenedy

Robert Kennedy was a famous American political leader but our guest today with a similar name is recognised around the world for other reasons. We speak in this program to Professor Kenedy in Toronto Canada to find out what he has discovered after conducting research in the areas of fathers, shared parenting and related issues for the last 15 years. This research has taken Robert to the UK, the US, Europe and most recently Australia and New Zealand where he has conducted thousands of interviews.

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Out on a Limb

With special guest: 

•  Simon Turner

 Simon Turner’s book Out on a Limb is refreshingly plain speaking. To read the book is like sitting down with a mate who has some important, perhaps life-changing, information to share. Using language we can all relate to, Simon takes us through the jungle that confronts a father at the gates of a Family Law dispute with the mother of their children.

Simon discusses what he describes as the three golden rules that were passed on to him informally by a Family Court Judge in an Art Gallery rather than a court room. Based on these golden rules Simon gives some invaluable ideas about how a dad can give himself the best chance of continuing to parent his child after a separation or divorce.

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Man Code

With special guest:

• Carolyn Managh

Carolyn Managh, the Man Whisperer, comes to our program today to lift the lid on what Australian men think about masculinity, women, and brands treating them like idiots. To do this Carolyn interviewed 140 Australian men including influential leaders and role models from diverse aspects of Australian life. These included Australian men in business, sport, men’s brands, military, popular culture, health, hospitality, construction and more.

The resulting data is statistically significant and it also paints a picture of what Australian men think on issues such as whether chivalry is dead. On the question of whether Australian men are romantic Carolyn’s conclusion is that Aussie men do want the romance but they want to include an element of surprise.

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Daddy's OK

With special guest:

• Dean Mason

In his book Daddy’s OK: Fathers’ stories of separation, divorce and rebuilding author Dean Mason takes us into the world of 14 families that have been through the trauma of separation and divorce. The 2006 Census showed that 50% of children in single parent families never have an overnight stay with the other parent, normally the Dad. But if our eyes glass over when contemplating the tens of thousands of Dads in this situation Dean brings it back to the individual personal level with these real life stories from his days as National Chairman of Dads in Distress Support Services.

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Reservoir Dad

With special guest:

• Clint Greagen

Our guest today provides us with an entertaining peek into what is still an unusual career in our society. Clint Greagen is a stay-at-home Dad with the skills of an award-winning blogger who tells us about his life in suburban Melbourne with four boy-children and a loving working wife.

There is nothing un-masculine about Clint’s struggles as he is assigned to buy breast pads for his wife and to do the cooking / washing / cleaning for the family. He has to juggle these responsibilities and apply some logic in the middle of the chaos and craziness.

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The other glass ceiling: fathers stepping up, mothers letting go

With special guest

• Charles Areni

In the news lately there have been frequent references to pay differentials between males and females. This is often put down to the different opportunities available in the workplace because of gender roles that are a hangover from a less-enlightened past. But what about the denial of opportunities to look after the children and get involved in other areas around the home? In brief, Mums have too many roles, Dads have too few.

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SuperDad SpeedBible: The toolbox for men with young kids

With special guest:

• Ryan Heffernan

Ever thought about how when you leave the hospital with your new baby you do not receive an instruction manual? Our guest this week Ryan Heffernan has addressed this issue. In his entertaining and informative book Ryan provides a welcome toolbox for any Dad left with the responsibility of caring for a young child in the age range of 0-6. In fact any parent will welcome this no-nonsense source book for handling the challenges of parenting where you get the benefit of learning from a single Dad’s experience. What’s more with Ryan Heffernan giving us the lesson there is a lot of fun to be had which everyone can enjoy

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Ten Conversations You Must Have With Your Son

With special guest:

•   Dr Tim Hawkes

Parents are all too familiar with the difficulties of relating to their sons in a language that they understand while they grow from boys to men. Our guest today is Dr Tim Hawkes who as Headmaster of The King’s School is responsible for 1500 boys. Dr Hawkes has held this position since 1998 adding to a wealth of experience gained in England and Australia on how boys can best reach their potential as men.

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Daddy's OK launch - Sydney

Dads on the Air was privileged to be invited to the Sydney launch of Dean Mason’s new book Daddy’s OK: Fathers’ stories of separation, divorce and rebuilding. The launch was held at Better Read than Dead bookshop in Newtown on Thursday 23 August 2012.

Leading up to the launch Dean has been on the airwaves, both radio and TV, telling us about his new book which sets out the real life experience of dads caught up in the Australian Family Law system. Many of the stories are heartbreaking. But even as we get emotionally involved through the printed page there is an underlying message about what fathers can and should be doing if they find themselves in this all too common experience.

The message here is not just for the dads, but for all their family and friends and those who may know someone going through the hell of family separation.

If you would like to share the experience of hearing from Dean about his book and listen to what was revealed at the launch by Michael Green QC and Phil York from DIDSS, listen in to our exclusive broadcast of a special night in Sydney with national implications.

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Powerful Training for 21st Century Men

With special guests:

• Patrick Bishop
• Paul Mischefki

The role of men has been changing rapidly in the last generation and while the responsibilities have increased there has not been a corresponding increase in men’s rights and expectations. The role as breadwinner still falls largely to the men but what about the changes in what it means to be a father, lover, community member or a friend?

With the growing number of fatherless families and the state playing an increasing role in our every day lives there are times when all men feel lost and needing some direction.

Our guests today tell us about two successful groups that provide training for men by men as a way of reconnecting with men’s essential masculinity. These programs are not just for those men who are struggling to cope with the changes in the 21st Century, they are for all men who want to reach their potential by accessing the huge untapped energy that is within us.

If you want to hear about men who have gone from counting their years to living their days join Patrick and Paul on our program today.

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Parental Alienation Action

 With special guests:

• Jill Egizii
• Karen Lebow

In the USA just as in Australia there are many judges, lawyers, psychiatrists and psychologists who have no idea of the damage done by parental alienation. Many in the general public do not even know there is a name for what they see happening to friends, workmates and even themselves.

For this reason it is vital that we improve the awareness and education relating to parental alienation. With that awareness of the damage done to children and parents will come social change.

Today we cross to the USA to talk to two highly motivated women who have their own personal stories to tell. They tell us how they used their own experience as a springboard to develop networks and action plans for dealing with this form of child abuse.

If you are not sure about what can be done to respond to this blight on our parenting practices listen in to hear what our guests are doing in such a big way.
 

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Men's Health Week - Part One

With special guests:

• Rob Koch
• Greg Millan

Men’s Health Week runs from 11 to 17 June in 2012 with the theme “environMENts” so that the focus is not just on specific ailments and illnesses. The idea is that all Australians - men, boys, women and girls - should become involved in creating better environments for males in our society.Some of these environments are active and involved Fathering, hobbies and sports and social and family relationships.

Today’s guests are leaders in the field of actively promoting men’s health and well-being. In Victoria and New South Wales they tell us what are the critical issues, the services they offer and some exciting new developments that they are involved in.

If you want to make an assessment of your own health and well-being there is no better place to start than by listening to these experts in the field.

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A brighter future for our youth

With Special guests:

• Chad Kolcze
• Martin Fisk

Our show today features up front a beautiful and haunting song by Janis Vaile about Parental Alienation. Icicles (I will wait for you) will be part of an upcoming special on the topic.

After a long time away from the studio our return to the airwaves was graced by the presence of two people who are doing something about boys at greater risk. At a time when there are so many one-parent families we know these risks.

Boys in families without Dads are more at risk of suicide, to have behavioural problems, to drop out of school and they represent over 70% of the inmates in juvenile state institutions.

To help counter these social problems there are good people providing mentoring services and other assistance. Today we cross to Byron Bay in the north of New South Wales and then to the nation’s capital, Canberra, to hear what Chad Kolcze and Martin Fisk are doing about keeping our youth happy and healthy.

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Our Closing the Gap Special

With special guests:

• Aaron Stuart
• Craig Hammond

We cross today to the frontline when we speak to Aaron Stuart who is the Manager of Aboriginal Projects at Centacare in Port Augusta South Australia. It is hard for many of us to imagine what it would be like to be the first person called after a suicide by one of our people. And then for it to happen again and again. Aaron is facing an endemic where the Aboriginal rate of suicide is four times greater than for non-Indigenous Australians and with children sometimes as young as 8 succumbing. Aaron provides some inspiring lessons about the positive action he is taking and tells us how he copes with the terrible stresses that go with his job.

Next we speak to Craig “Bourkie” Hammond who is the Leader Indigenous Programs, Family Action Centre, University of Newcastle. Craig is involved with a number of projects including the Nar-un-bah and Thou Walla engaging Aboriginal Fathers project. Fathering roles in the Aboriginal community extend to grandparents, uncles and older brothers. As one of eleven children himself and with a background as a youth worker Bourkie brings his skills and reputation to provide guidance and assistance in strengthening the relationship between Indigenous fathers and their children.

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Good Sports and Great Dads

With special guests:

• Peter FitzSimons
• Neil Young

Our guests today have both written about what it means to be a father and they let us in on some of the influences that have shaped the way they relate to their children.

Peter FitzSimons is well known through his exploits on the rugby field and as a wide ranging author, journalist and commentator. We talk to Peter about his family values that were implanted as part of a big family growing up in Peats Ridge New South Wales.

Neil Young grew up in England but having come under the spell of life in the Byron Bay region he became a late blossomer on the soccer field and most importantly as a father. Neil has some great stories, some funny and some poignant, about his experiences on and off the field.

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Europe for Christmas

With special guests:

• Benjamin Wondergem
• Ken Thompson
• Peter Tromp
• Robert Whiston

In our last show for 2011 and in the leadup to Christmas we have a European flavour. In the studio we are joined by Benjamin Wondergem visiting Sydney from the Netherlands and Ken Thompson who is well known to listeners in connection with the Hague Convention and more generally in the area of reforming the law on International Parental Child Abduction.

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Pillars of Strength

With special guests:

• Gary Sillett
• Michael Bourne

We have an opportunity in today’s show to draw inspiration from the way one father has responded to a tragedy in his family by speaking to Gary Sillett. Gary has established an Australian first, a program to help Dads cope when their newborn baby is in need of intensive medical care and to provide support if their baby loses the fight for life. This new program is called Pillars of Strength.

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Our Grande Finale Salute to International Men’s Day

With special guests:

• Geneuvieve Twala
• Diane Sears
• Donald Berment

Today we present the final show in our series on International Men’s Day (IMD) 2011 where the theme is:

Giving Boys the Best Possible Start in Life

We start out in Africa going to the home of the No 1 Ladies Detective Agency, namely Botswana, and finish up in Trinidad and Tobago via the USA.

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